Coming soon to a DATA EXPUNGED near you!
by Ricky the King
Summary: Alt. title "The Fuckening." This is a parody. A young boy finds himself trapped in a movie theater when an "SCP movie" transports every SCP from the movie into the theater. Please don't take this seriously.


I am not special, but I suppose if these guys think I am, well... that's good enough for me.

As I sit in the movie theater chair, with one of the 939's heads in my lap, I stroke it absentmindedly while watching the movie playing on the screen. It took a lot of time to repair it, but now it works fine, save for a few random black spots on the screen every once and a while.

"We'll have to fix that, at some point," I say out loud.

"Fix that," the 939 says back, in a voice identical to mine. It used to be unnerving, hearing my voice come from the creature. But now...

It doesn't seem to bother me.

"Shh, girl. We're getting to the interesting part."

She goes quiet after murmuring "Shh" at me. My eyes wander back to the screen, where the movie that brought me here is playing.

And to think, it only started a few months ago, when I stepped into the dark theater for the first time, the light of the outside world disappearing behind me when the door slammed shut.

I think someone from school was talking about it, and that's how I heard about it.

Up until that point, I had no idea anyone in my school even knew about the SCP foundation. As far as I knew, I was the only person at school who actively participated in that little corner of the internet. But I can almost remember a group of kids walking past me, talking about an "SCP Movie."

I remember scoffing. _It's probably going to be stupid,_ I thought when I looked it up online. Movies like this usually were. I can't remember the last time I saw a _good_ horror movie. It would probably just be a lot of jumpscares, loud noises, and stupid people doing stupid things and getting killed and/or eaten. _Fun._

So I bought a ticket, of course. I wanted to see for myself what was going to happen.

I guess that's where everything started to go downhill.

I came to the theater probably an hour before the movie was supposed to start. My mom had to do something in the general area of the theater, so she left me there, because her appointment was scheduled around that time so she had to be there early. Thus, I had to be there too, so I spent my time buying popcorn and a soda and then sitting down in one of the chairs along the wall as I waited for the hour to be over.

I wanted to get in the theater about ten minutes before the movie started, so I could still get a good seat without having to sit through all of the annoying pre-movie commercials. I started to get a little antsy because of the sugary soda, though, so I got up to go to the bathroom about thirty minutes before the movie was scheduled to start.

That was when I met the people who were going to change my life forever.

Looking back on it, I suppose you could say it was a good thing, because their act of aggression meant that my life was saved, but at the time I was pissed.

As I came out of the men's bathroom, I was suddenly surrounded by a group of teenagers, probably about my age or older. Instinctively, I tried to back away, but was blocked by the biggest of the group, who looked down at me and sneered.

"Well, well, well, look at what we have here," he said, ending his sentence in a transphobic slur I'd prefer not to repeat. "You know the men's bathroom is for _men_ , right?"

I gulped. "Yeah, that's why I was in there. I am a man."

"I don't think so, sweetheart," said another one of the group gathered around me. "How about we show you what a _real man_ does?"

Next thing I knew, I was shoved into a locker whilst screaming my head off for anyone to help me. Someone _had_ to have heard me, but no one said or did anything, or tried to stop the boys. Upon shutting the locker and spinning the lock, one of them peered through the vent at the top of the locker at me.

"Now, stay here and be a good girl so we can go watch our movie," he said, purposefully emphasizing "girl" as he did.

I managed to hold back my tears until after they left, at which point I started sobbing hysterically. Was there really no hope left for humanity? Were people really this cruel? As I cried, the frustrations from my life started boiling over. I was failing school, my meds weren't working, nobody saw me as a real boy and probably never would, and now my bullies were going unpunished.

Just as I was rearing back to kick the locker door as hard as I could, sunlight – or, at least, what I thought was sunlight – filtered in through the vents of the locker. I would have ignored this phenomena, had it not been for the voice that spoke to me:

 _Dearest child, stop your movements, and listen to the wisdom I am going to bestow upon you._

So I stopped and looked up and around, trying to figure out where the sound was coming from. "Who said that?" I asked, holding up my fists like I was ready to fight. The voice chuckled, before speaking again.

 _I am the light, dearest child. There is no need to be upset. Dry your tears and listen to what I have to say._

The voice sounded airy, and almost far away, as if it was coming from my own head. I shook my head as if to clear it, before I asked, "Who are you? _What_ are you?"

 _I am the light. I am everything that once was, is, and will be. I am the God, I am the Goddess, and I am Man. Most importantly, I am the keeper of all knowledge in the world._

"If this is some kind of joke, I'm not laughing," I hissed out. "Just let me get out of here before I suffocate, okay?"

 _Once you hear my knowledge, you will have no fear of suffocation, or of anything else that may harm you,_ the voice continued. _You will no longer need to fear anything. Instead, everything will fear **you.** Do you understand?_

"I hear you, but I don't know if I believe you," I replied. Now my anger was giving way to curiosity. Where was all of this coming from? "How can you prove to me what you can do?"

 _Touch my light, and you will understand,_ the voice replied. _Touch my light, and nothing will be able to harm you again. Touch my light, and you, too, will become eternal._

I hesitated for a moment, and then reached my hand out.

And I touched the light.


End file.
